I Am Dane Barbados Jr.

Recently a person told me, Dane Barbados Jr., that I "was not mean enough" in my estimation of the emaciated pisswipe known as Paris Hilton.

The people should know. Dane Barbados Jr. cares not what you think of what he writes. He cares not what you think of him. Truly he cares very little of you.

Dane Barbados Jr. has sipped absinthe from betwixt the breasts of nubile, zaftig, virgins. He has smoked cigars with kings after raining blow after towering blow upon their shattered bodies.

Dane Barbados Jr. has rutted with redheaded princesses and brown-skinned heiresses on mountaintops, kicked them down and hurled profanites after.

He has wrestled with gods and fornicated with goddesses. He is better than you.

If you were Dane Barbados Jr. would you care what the people had to say?