Dane Barbados Jr. on: X-3
So Dane Barbados Jr. your Humble Narrator has just returned from the cinema. He went there to view your X3: The Last Stand.
Dane Barbados Jr. is familiar with the characters of the films and still found the first two movies to be perfectly well made, very well directed, complete and utter bores.
As such he recieved exactly what he was expecting from the newest director Brett Ratner, to whit: decent action, horrible everything else.
Dane Barbados Jr. was displeased to find that the young and strangely attractive Anna Paquin (Rogue) had been phased out for the freakishly bubble-headed and alienesque actress portraying Kitty Pryde.
He was also dissappointed to see the executives of Fox kowtow to Halle Berry's histrionics and threats granting her a much larger role and leadership of the titular team (although to their credits they fashioned her a MUCH better wig).
Killing off Cyclops, the historical leader of the team, off screen in the first 20 minutes? Terrible and wasteful.
Also of note was the distasteful and sloppy dropping and picking up of plot threads seemingly at random. There's Angel...and he's gone 'til the end of the movie. Wait what's Rogue doing? We find out at the end of the movie.
And out of a comic superhero team who's had some 40 members since it's inception what troglodytic retrobate decided to have only 6 X-Men in the climactic battle?
Also the effects for the Juggernaut were abysmal. The second worse "freakishly large man" effects Dane Barbados Jr. has seen on film, preceeded only by Mr. Hyde of the brain-crunchingly bad and improbable League of Extraordinary Gentlemen...or LGX a disgustingly Americanized shortening if ever there was such.
Dane Barbados Jr. will however applaud the fortitude of the film makers for braving the increasingly Evangelical Christian American populace by making the character called "Angel" such a blatant and obvious homosexual.
But Dane Barbados Jr. must ask...like so many others...is Arclight (played by possible she/he "Omahyra" really a man?
Even after seeing this creature's bare (and supposed) breasts Dane Barbados Jr. is not sure. His dreams will surely be haunted.
In closing on X3 Dane Barbados Jr. neither approves or disapproves. On Arclight/Omahyra he steadfastly disapproves.
....so does his libido.
xmen, x-men, x men, briney spears, jenna jameson, kfed, kevin federline, angelina jokie, brad pitt, tom cruise , sury, adult swim, penis, breasts, tits, cum
Dane Barbados Jr. is familiar with the characters of the films and still found the first two movies to be perfectly well made, very well directed, complete and utter bores.
As such he recieved exactly what he was expecting from the newest director Brett Ratner, to whit: decent action, horrible everything else.
Dane Barbados Jr. was displeased to find that the young and strangely attractive Anna Paquin (Rogue) had been phased out for the freakishly bubble-headed and alienesque actress portraying Kitty Pryde.
He was also dissappointed to see the executives of Fox kowtow to Halle Berry's histrionics and threats granting her a much larger role and leadership of the titular team (although to their credits they fashioned her a MUCH better wig).
Killing off Cyclops, the historical leader of the team, off screen in the first 20 minutes? Terrible and wasteful.
Also of note was the distasteful and sloppy dropping and picking up of plot threads seemingly at random. There's Angel...and he's gone 'til the end of the movie. Wait what's Rogue doing? We find out at the end of the movie.
And out of a comic superhero team who's had some 40 members since it's inception what troglodytic retrobate decided to have only 6 X-Men in the climactic battle?
Also the effects for the Juggernaut were abysmal. The second worse "freakishly large man" effects Dane Barbados Jr. has seen on film, preceeded only by Mr. Hyde of the brain-crunchingly bad and improbable League of Extraordinary Gentlemen...or LGX a disgustingly Americanized shortening if ever there was such.
Dane Barbados Jr. will however applaud the fortitude of the film makers for braving the increasingly Evangelical Christian American populace by making the character called "Angel" such a blatant and obvious homosexual.
But Dane Barbados Jr. must ask...like so many others...is Arclight (played by possible she/he "Omahyra" really a man?
Even after seeing this creature's bare (and supposed) breasts Dane Barbados Jr. is not sure. His dreams will surely be haunted.
In closing on X3 Dane Barbados Jr. neither approves or disapproves. On Arclight/Omahyra he steadfastly disapproves.
....so does his libido.
xmen, x-men, x men, briney spears, jenna jameson, kfed, kevin federline, angelina jokie, brad pitt, tom cruise , sury, adult swim, penis, breasts, tits, cum
posted by Dane Barbados Jr. at 1:15 AM
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