Dane Barbados Jr. on: Madonna.
Dane Barbados Jr. proclaims that the subtitle for this particular entry in his story is:
"When delusional, hypocritical, opportunistic, over the hill, she-hags need to be put out to pasture."
Well, well faithful readers of the thoughts of Dane Barbados Jr. Yes I know I have taken a considerable leave of absence from updating my story. I do not apologize for this. Neither will I explain. I am simply too far above the vast majority of you all to care enough.
Having said thus, I will share this hilarous bit of fluff that sent Dane Barbados Jr. into hearty gales of melodic laughter this day:
Madonna says Gwen Stefani is a copycat. The singer says Gwen has copied her in many different ways. “She ripped me off. We work with a lot of the same people. She married a Brit, she's got blonde hair and she likes fashion.”
Now, a truly rare thing, Dane Barbados Jr. knows not where to even begin with this bit.
Perhaps the sheer hilarity of the criteria that Madonna compiles to prove her ludicrous claims of thievery.
They work with a lot of the same people? The manufactured American Pop industry is not that well populated with hitmakers last checked.
She married a Brit? Surely Ms. Stefani entered into a traditionally life-long partnership and commitment with someone she chose purely for the singular reason that Madonna wed someone from the same geographical reason. Please, you overdone gasbag, pseudo-kabbalistic land cow.
And, the personal favorites of your humble narrator: she's blonde...and she likes fashion. A descriptions that fit roughly half of the females in the entire world above the age of 10.
It is clear to myself and anyone with more than a monoloid intelligence that Madonna clearly sees herself as more than she is (namely a used up, overfull, comebucket).
When was the last time she had an album that was a hit? Barbados truly knows not.
Truth be told my sycophants, even the lowly of you know what this overlong trollop whore does not: She would register naught the proverbial blip on the radar if not for her rampant and shameful commercialization and whoring out of the Jewish religion.
Are we to believe that her legion of sub-moronic, vapid, clueless, Hollywood Whores (both male and female) represent a true look at the power of the Jewish faith? Is making it into a profitable fad truly a testament to the long persevering religion?
Dane Barbados Jr. thinks not...as should even the most cretinous of his readers.
Then let us examine her recent comments denoucing your Americas and promiscuous lifesytles.
Yes you read correctly. These comments were made by the slatternly she-whore whom built her entire fortune, fame and notoriety on the fact that she was, in fact, a gigantic whore.
Whom published a fetish and nudity stuffed book entitled "SEX" and lauded her laundry list of celebrity lovers/hepititis and syphillis patients.
So obviously we must take her plight quite seriously.
And lastly, the real meat of the issue, is that despite her grandest wishes and all attempts to prove otherwise a simple fact remains: Madonna is not, nor ever was, "hot."
When she first arose on the scene she sported a delightful 80's near-unibrow. Not hot.
Then she got bold with the over-sculpted, thick wedge eyebrows. Still not hot.
Then, hilariously, in her video attempted the daring bondage and cornrows look. Laughable? Yes. Hilarious? Oh, yes. Hot? Not an iota.
Then she seemed to settle into the haggard "cigar smoke and whiskey" barfly look that she has worn ever since. Hot? Well surely you can answer that for yourself.
The simple fact is that if this whore wouldn't have acted like exactly what she was (a whore) and whored herself out in controversy and blasphemy she would never have been famous to start with.
Now Dane Barbados Jr. is not particularly a fan of Ms. Stefani. She has an angelic voice to be sure, but no real musical talent. And her air of "grrl power" has been exposed as naught but a fraud by the addition of her very noticible breast implants. But one can at least note that she has not begun to whore herself out and masturbate onstage with a crucifix whilst masturbating male dancer with kaballah beads yet.
When she does that, perhaps Madonna has a case.
"When delusional, hypocritical, opportunistic, over the hill, she-hags need to be put out to pasture."
Well, well faithful readers of the thoughts of Dane Barbados Jr. Yes I know I have taken a considerable leave of absence from updating my story. I do not apologize for this. Neither will I explain. I am simply too far above the vast majority of you all to care enough.
Having said thus, I will share this hilarous bit of fluff that sent Dane Barbados Jr. into hearty gales of melodic laughter this day:
Madonna says Gwen Stefani is a copycat. The singer says Gwen has copied her in many different ways. “She ripped me off. We work with a lot of the same people. She married a Brit, she's got blonde hair and she likes fashion.”
Now, a truly rare thing, Dane Barbados Jr. knows not where to even begin with this bit.
Perhaps the sheer hilarity of the criteria that Madonna compiles to prove her ludicrous claims of thievery.
They work with a lot of the same people? The manufactured American Pop industry is not that well populated with hitmakers last checked.
She married a Brit? Surely Ms. Stefani entered into a traditionally life-long partnership and commitment with someone she chose purely for the singular reason that Madonna wed someone from the same geographical reason. Please, you overdone gasbag, pseudo-kabbalistic land cow.
And, the personal favorites of your humble narrator: she's blonde...and she likes fashion. A descriptions that fit roughly half of the females in the entire world above the age of 10.
It is clear to myself and anyone with more than a monoloid intelligence that Madonna clearly sees herself as more than she is (namely a used up, overfull, comebucket).
When was the last time she had an album that was a hit? Barbados truly knows not.
Truth be told my sycophants, even the lowly of you know what this overlong trollop whore does not: She would register naught the proverbial blip on the radar if not for her rampant and shameful commercialization and whoring out of the Jewish religion.
Are we to believe that her legion of sub-moronic, vapid, clueless, Hollywood Whores (both male and female) represent a true look at the power of the Jewish faith? Is making it into a profitable fad truly a testament to the long persevering religion?
Dane Barbados Jr. thinks not...as should even the most cretinous of his readers.
Then let us examine her recent comments denoucing your Americas and promiscuous lifesytles.
Yes you read correctly. These comments were made by the slatternly she-whore whom built her entire fortune, fame and notoriety on the fact that she was, in fact, a gigantic whore.
Whom published a fetish and nudity stuffed book entitled "SEX" and lauded her laundry list of celebrity lovers/hepititis and syphillis patients.
So obviously we must take her plight quite seriously.
And lastly, the real meat of the issue, is that despite her grandest wishes and all attempts to prove otherwise a simple fact remains: Madonna is not, nor ever was, "hot."
When she first arose on the scene she sported a delightful 80's near-unibrow. Not hot.
Then she got bold with the over-sculpted, thick wedge eyebrows. Still not hot.
Then, hilariously, in her video attempted the daring bondage and cornrows look. Laughable? Yes. Hilarious? Oh, yes. Hot? Not an iota.
Then she seemed to settle into the haggard "cigar smoke and whiskey" barfly look that she has worn ever since. Hot? Well surely you can answer that for yourself.
The simple fact is that if this whore wouldn't have acted like exactly what she was (a whore) and whored herself out in controversy and blasphemy she would never have been famous to start with.
Now Dane Barbados Jr. is not particularly a fan of Ms. Stefani. She has an angelic voice to be sure, but no real musical talent. And her air of "grrl power" has been exposed as naught but a fraud by the addition of her very noticible breast implants. But one can at least note that she has not begun to whore herself out and masturbate onstage with a crucifix whilst masturbating male dancer with kaballah beads yet.
When she does that, perhaps Madonna has a case.
posted by Dane Barbados Jr. at 5:13 PM
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