Dane Barbados Jr. shares: Words of Wisdom

Many people do not know this, because their level of intelligence is akin to the smarts demonstrated by a lumbering housefly circling a pile of dung, sitting atop the chest of a willing and bored housewife in search of marital spice.

You may find it useful.

A blow to the ear from a cupped palm, when applied with necessary force, is capable of altering the air pressure inside the ear-canal to the point of bursting the eardrum and shattering the equilibrium of a cretin, regardless of size, which will lower them to a kneeling or laying position ripe for a kick to the vulnerable temple region.

This tactic can be utilized by nearly anyone and is more reliable and easy to administer than the trusty kidney punch.

For the ladies to give that extra "oomph" you may slip a flat piece of heavy metal (1-2 lbs.) into a glove, slide the glove onto your hand and administer the blow.

This move, known as "boxing the ears," was popularized in your American National Footballer League by the player Deacon Jones.

...this tactic is now punishable with an extremely large fine when used on the playing field.

Remember kids, Dane Barbados Jr. says: Incapacitate first, crush testicles and self-esteem second.

The more you know.